I came across something today that kind of bothered me in my heart. I was on the internet looking at an organization that had run into some personnel difficulties. As I read through their “History,” I was shocked to see that the person who had founded the organization had been completely wiped off the records. There was not a single mention of this person’s name anywhere on their website.
I understand that their sinful behavior was not appropriate for their role in the organization. Yet, I don’t think that an entire portion of an organization’s history should be deleted because of this behavior.
The first thing that came to my mind was what would have happened if King David, the man after God’s own heart, had been left out of the Bible because of his sinful behavior? He was an adulterer and murderer, not exactly the poster child for promoting godly behavior. Yet, leaving David out of the Bible would have meant deleting part of Jesus’ ancestral lineage.
History is history. Every experience that we initiate or that is pushed upon us works together to form us into the person we are today. Speaking from experience, I can tell you if you try to delete or smother part of your history it can end up becoming a festering wound.
Almost all of the memories from my history that I tried to repress or delete were the ones that ended up needing the most attention in Inner Healing. Just because we try to wipe out a situation or memory doesn’t mean that it disappears. It is still within us, albeit buried deeply in the recesses of our minds.
I remember being very concerned about one of my hidden memories in particular. I had spent years trying to avoid discussing it with counselors. I had put that memory in a locked box deep within my mind desperately hoping that the “out of sight, out of mind” theory would go into effect. While the memory had been locked away, the impact of the memory was felt in every relationship I had during those years. Pretending that it didn’t exist – that it wasn’t part of my history- just added insult to the injury.
God’s timing is perfect. When He decides that it is time to bring these wounds into the light He will show up as our Healer and Comforter. He will never give us more than we can handle. When God decided it was time for those hidden memories to be healed He gently walked me through the healing process.
Inner healing isn’t about erasing our memory or re-writing our history. It’s about healing our emotional, physical, and spiritual responses to our history. Inner healing is about being set free from the bondage of our history. So, that we may stop being stuck in the past and move forward into the future that God has planned for us.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28 (NLT)